captain-lovelace:

Listen. Listen. Doug Eiffel is not a stupid man, but he is a moron. What do I mean by this, you ask? I mean that he is the kind of person who can figure out how to survive for months on end in a shuttle with extremely limited food and water by cryogenically freezing himself every day and sending distress signals and using the only functioning engine a little bit at a time, but is also the kind of person who sees nothing wrong with smoking a cigarette on a space station. When I say Doug Eiffel is an idiot, I do not mean he is stupid, I mean that even if the man had a shred of common sense at one point he probably used it to make a tiny paper airplane and threw it at someone in a position of authority. Doug Eiffel is prime moron representation. A true fool.